Oh, Connecticut man. Whatever would we do without you bringing such joy into our lives? Truly, we’d be so lost without you.
Not only that, you brighten the day of our local law enforcement by giving them something to giggle about.
Today’s Connecticut Man comes in the form of 46-year-old Nelson Perez of Ansonia.
CT Post reports that Perez landed himself behind bars after hitting up the Marshall’s in Waterbury for a little crime spree. Well, you can’t say the man doesn’t have taste.
On top of that, the man had a mission. He shoved a pair of $99 Timberland boots under his jacket, jumped into his getaway car driven by a 27-year-old Lynette Tevenal, and peeled out of the parking lot. Talk about a well-orchestrated grab n go.
Considering knockoff Timberlands can go for as low as $13, the guy was pretty serious on getting the real deal. Makes you wonder what he needed the boots for? Hiking? Yard work? Or was he simply suffering for fashion?
Sadly, Perez failed to calculate how close the store was to a police department, so his plan was doomed from the start.
According to the police report, officers arrived just as Perez and Tevenal batman’d out of the lot.
Troopers gave a high-speed pursuit down the Connecticut Turnpike before Perez’s car was forced to the side of the highway. But this is where Nelson Perez the Connecticut Man was born.
Police watched as Perez barrel rolled out of the passenger seat, vaulted over the guardrail, and fled down the embankment. No word if the Timbs were still in his little hands or not since the boots weren’t immediately recovered.
And he would have gotten away with it, too, had he not opted to take public transportation. Perez’s foot chase was brought to a heel when he jumped aboard a Greater Bridgeport Transit Authority Bus. Obviously, the driver stopped the bus for the pursuing officers, and Perez was gracefully arrested.
Back on the Turnpike, Tevenal was apprehended and police discovered two young children in the backseat of the car. The children were not in car seats, either.
Perez remains in custody on $25,00 bond and has been charged with risk of injury to children, sixth-degree larceny, and interfering with police. Tevenal was charged similarly but was released on a written promise to return to court.