Getting pulled over is the worst. There’s the panicked moment of realization that you’re going too fast. The flicker of hope when the cop doesn’t pull out right away. Finally there’s the crushing defeat when he flips on the cherries and berries and pulls out to chase you down.
Of course, that’s just when the dance begins. Now, pulled on to the shoulder of the road, you have to deploy your best strategy for getting out of this ticket. Do you play the “I was just traveling with the flow of traffic” card? Do you make up a fake emergency to explain your speed? Do you just play dumb? Or, do you go big and try to the flirt escape?
Whatever your go-to strategy, it probably doesn’t work very often. If a cop catches you in a moving violation, it’s pretty tough to get out of it. Your best bet is almost always to act polite and respectful, accept the violation, and protest it in court if you feel it was unjustified.
Or, you know, you could just learn to juggle.
That’s the pro-tip I’m taking away from a video making the rounds that shows a University of Central Arkansas student getting pulled over and circus-ing his way out of a ticket.
This video is so weird. On the one hand, it has some moments that speak to the tense relationship between police and regular citizens. At the 3:15 mark, the cop asks what’s in the kid’s pocket and the student immediately pulls his hands away and puts them up. He’s probably seen enough YouTube videos to know how quickly a simple traffic stop can get more serious.
But just as quickly, the whole thing turns super light-hearted. The student explains that it’s a magic trick and the cops turn into little kids asking to see a show! Before you know it, he’s juggling while the cops film a YouTube video for the kid’s channel.
This is how all cop videos should end. Everyone acts polite, the violation or charges are explained peacefully, and it all ends with a juggling show. Note to self: Stash some juggling pins in my back seat for future traffic stops.