Disclaimer: This story contains subject matter that may be considered offensive to some
Graffiti comes in many forms. Sometimes it is intricate. Meaningful. Inspiring.
Other times it’s amateur. Lazy. Confusing.
And then there’s the most common graffiti of them all: the good ol’ fashioned penis. The symbol that, once mastered by a wide-eyed young man, appears on bathroom stalls, cafeteria tables, and lockers around schools. Or on your face after you pass out at a party. Y’know, immature stuff.
Now, a ballsy artist has taken the craft to the next level.
Since January, citizens of New Haven have been getting the shaft by the “penis menace.” Nothing is safe from his signature: property signs, power boxes, windows, brick walls… the list expands every day and has now reached an “epidemic level.”
Like the hydra, you cut off one head, two more appear. Cleanup efforts are something of an uphill battle. Even worse: the perp is starting to get a little cocky. He’s now taking extra care to show his face on security footage, as though to directly challenge the city.
The New Haven Independent says citizens of Westville have reached a breaking point and are beseeching any and all levels of authority to intervene. Like a New Haven version of The Avengers: the mayor, city police, local boards, and agencies have all been summoned to take down the penis menace.
On a serious note: cleanup does cost time and money. It’s rarely is the responsibility of the city, which means residents have been spending over five months wiping away phallus after phallus to no avail.
Now with city officials working to get to the bottom of this, many hope the epidemic will end relatively soon. Police are currently taking a closer look at security footage and hope to identify the perpetrator soon.
When police eventually bring him in, his punishment will be anything but a slap on the wrist. City officials have made it clear that he will be made an example of.
Livable City Initiative specialist Evan Trachten told the Independent that he will stand trial, “We are going to bring him to court. We are going to tell him how offensive and stupid this is.”
So, other than it being another slow news day in Connecticut, this story did drum up some age old questions: why do men draw dicks on everything?
Is there some deep psychological meaning behind this? Are they simply tagging their property? Maybe they need a reminder of what their manhood looks like?
Perhaps those are questions the penis menace can answer.