Here in Connecticut, we are spoiled. Ask anyone how far they drive to get a legitimately great slice of pizza, and the answer is almost universally under 30 minutes.
Sure, we’ve got our Big 4 (Modern, Sally’s, Pepe’s, and Bar) in New Haven, but even at the local level you can find a top tier pie within a quick drive. The small town pizzerias in Connecticut are excellent.
Unfortunately, Canada doesn’t seem to be so lucky. I’ve only visited our neighbors to the north once in my life, and I didn’t stay long enough for a slice. But if this video is to be believed, three young Canadian guys were willing to spend two days, drive 500 miles, and cross state and international borders just to grab a slice at an American restaurant.
That restaurant? McDonalds.
If you watched all 8 minutes of that (or even skipped around), you realized that this was no small endeavor. These guys loaded up a car, recorded hours upon hours of footage of them driving, and sang “Take Me Home, Country Roads” what seemed like 30,000 times. And they did it all for a “sweet, sweet pie” from the golden arches.
You’ll have to excuse me, but I just don’t understand any of this. I get that there’s some novelty to the trip – only two McDonalds locations still serve pizza. But that still leaves a lot of questions. For one, the location in Pomeroy, Ohio serves pizza. The other (the one these guys visited) is in Spencer, Virginia. Only the Pomeroy location is a full hour closer to the starting destination of this disturbed road trip.
So why did they go all the way West Virginia? Why didn’t they take a little extra time and hit the best pizza places on the continent in Connecticut? Why did they go through all the trouble of driving 500 miles for a meal at McDonalds!?
The only explanation I can think of is that Canadians are deprived of good pizza, so much so that these three guys lost their minds and decided driving over 8 hours to West Virginia for fast food pizza was a good idea.
Thoughts and prayers for Canada, everybody. Thoughts and prayers.